The daycare diaries: Biting

Today another child at daycare bit Emma. This is the first time that Emma has been bitten. I have gotten notes sent home warning me of infectious diarrhea, vomiting, green snot, bumps, bruises, scrapes and scratches but I have never gotten a note warning me about the human teeth marks on my kid. I’m sure most moms would be mad and I do hate that some gross little kid was gnawing on Emma’s arm but the note sent home was the funniest note ever. I find it amusing that the people at daycare spend so much time with children that they tend to speak to everyone as if they were a child. That is the only explanation I can find to explain this poem that was handed to me today when I picked Emma up.

Biting
My teeth are here…HIP! HIP! HOORAY!!!
(I wonder who I can bite today?)
I’ve got to try them out, you see.
I must find out if they’ll work for me!!

My teachers say “Now you must not bite,”
“It hurts your friends and fills them with fright.”
So I’m trying to keep my teeth to myself
And be nice to my friends like a good little elf.

But please be patient as I go through this phase.
It is necessary to my development in varying ways.
And I will continue to do my best,
To use my words when my emotions they test.

Wow. Emma obviously can’t read, so this little poem was meant for me. I feel like I should respond with a poem for the daycare teachers.

Hey I just turned thirty-two.
This may be a surprise to you.
When you tell me how Emma did,
Don’t talk to me like I’m a kid.
I can read and I can write
And teach my kid not to bite.
But if some child invades her space
I hope she’ll slap them in the face.